a little more meat please

Please understand, Niman Ranch, I'm not afraid of a little fat and all, but recently when I buy your bacon I can't help but think, gosh, could I have just a little meat with that fat?

I don't remember it always being this way, and the batch I bought Monday was the worst--I estimate over 90% fat. I'm glad the pigs are fat and healthy and all but really, after the fat melts away in my skillet, there's not a lot to bite into.

must. write. cover letter!

(yeah, yeah, i'm applying for a job.)

okay, who doesn't hate writing cover letters? it's one of those things that must be done, right? i guess i've had pretty good luck in the past - probably got about 90% of the jobs i applied for... but here's the thing, i only apply for jobs that i really really want, and then put all my energy into them. consequently, i think i might close off a lot of opportunities. i also probably underestimate my worth and experience, and not aim for high enough jobs.

to battle!

i had strange dreams about my cats - during the night, in real life, my cats were wanting in and out of the house. i got up several times during the night to oblige them, but finally, irritated and annoyed, i lay in bed with my eyes determinedly closed, to try to fall back asleep before the dreadful alarm.

one cat was scratching and banging at the door with such insistence it filtered into my half-awake state, and i dreamed i was defending a house besieged by cats, and i had to plan out a strategy for a counter attack. i imagined unleashing my troops, creating a feint to draw out the fiendish beasts, and finish them off with a swift blow of the calvary.

i guess this serves me right for staying up late reading about famous battle tactics and for having inconsiderate cats, though little can be done about the latter.

looking forward to this.

i loved talladega nights. it wasn't necessarily the rolling-on-the-floor laughing (as elicited by the Arrested Development episode "Mr. F", which remains, in my mind, the most brilliant moment in television), but there was something fun and charming about it. so now i'm soooo looking forward to blades of glory. sorry, but it looks awesome. i can't wait!

comedies are generally a hard sell for me, second only to romance on my list of movies to avoid (and don't even get me started on that most heinous of all genres, the romantic comedy). the last movies i really remember laughing at were from grade school - space balls, naked gun. later in life i loved trigger happy t.v. (okay, maybe because the first time i watched it i was pretty drunk on champaign), Arrested Development, Are you being served, absolutely fabulous, and, of course, the daily show, though we don't get cable any more. the occasional movies include zoolander, a funny thing happened on the way to the forum, and.... can't think of anything else right at this moment. surprisingly, i never got into monty python that much, though it was worth a chuckle or two, surprising, because it seems just the sort of thing i'd like.

and i spin my wheels again

every time i go to the gym i am struck by the irony of it all. here am i, expending energy to expend energy because i expend energy because i don't want to expend energy.

huh?

right. here it is again: i use the electrically-generated resistance on the exercise equipment at the gym to expend excess energy (i.e. all the crap that i've eaten), but i only have to do this because i drive a car rather than walk or bicycle.

see the irony? i think about this all the time with each turn on the elliptical exerciser. we're blind to the connection between biological energy and chemical energy, though the laws of thermodynamics state they have to be related, and if you go back far enough they are - where do fossil fuels come from again? oh right, fossils.

and then i think about this great mass of sweating bodies, working desperately to expend all their energy so it doesn't build up and become potential energy (i.e. fat), and i think, what a shame. someday i'll build a gym to harness all that energy, all those legs pumping and wheels turning. at the very least, i should be able to harness enough of the resistance generated to sustain the resistance people want to exercise.

i heard a rumor once of a bed that can generate electricity while you, you know, make love. it makes sense - the springs act as oscillators and you should be able to generate a few volts. sadly, i've not been able to confirm this device. but it makes you wonder - we're always looking at the big picture - we've got to build a nuclear reactor to produce enough electricity for millions. but the little things can add up - a few volts there, a few volts here, and pretty soon, you're off the grid. and what an aphrodisiac? come on, baby, we need to make some energy so we can cook dinner. heh heh.

i've often joked to ryan about rigging up a stationary bicycle to generate electricity while he exercises. i wish i were more savvy with electronics, otherwise, i'd be tempted to try.

ringing ears

i've had a disturbing ringing in the ears for the last two days. i keep telling myself that it's because i'm stuffed up with this dangnabbit cold, but ever since i read an article about tinnitus (most shockingly a man committed suicide because he couldn't get rid of the incessant ringing) i've been especially cautious about my ears. for that reason, i rarely wear headphones (a leading cause of tinnitus).

well, on the plane ride back, i tried to take a decongestant to clear my sinuses. but it didn't work, because my ear freaking hurt coming during the descent. i kept trying to blow my nose or flex my jaw to alleviate the pressure but i wasn't successful. then, suddenly, a loud squeak in my ear. i've had this before when i've blown my nose. but it was louder than it had been before. and now this infernal ringing... so i hope its not a permanent rupture in my eardrum.

japan

products like these are why japan is so much cooler than the u.s.... it's called a joba, and it's a fake horse, essentially a saddle with stirrups, which you ride, in your home, for exercise. this particular model advertises "advanced 3-D virtual reality technology imitates horseback riding experience and helps to build physical strength and endurance." how freakin' awesome is that?

on t.v. in japan there was a "news special" on toilets with new features that make it easier to clean. and i kid you not, they went to people's houses to interview women who had these new toilets. whoa.

all in all, it's good to be back, though i miss all these strange things. that and the food.

mmm... the food...

like the fairy tales

there's nothing like a good old-fashioned, cinderella-style house cleaning to clear the mind. that's right, i'm talking full-on bucket-and-rags, hands-and-knees scrubbing.

on another note, i'm leaving for japan. tomorrow. gulp. i'm only staying for a week and will be mostly with my aunt and uncle in the 'burbs of tokyo, possibly visiting my two cousins who recently had babies (babies, yay!). (okay, maybe the cleaning fumes have gotten into my head instead of clarity).

this trip comes with perfect timing. nostalgia has been poking at me recently. i'm sad ryan won't be able to join me. i want to share it all with him, the sight of crows against a cloudy sky, clothes sticking to skin in the muggy heat, the smell of rain in the city, all of the things that remind me of japan.

virago

this made me a little sad... virago, which means "a loud-voiced, ill-tempered, scolding woman; a shrew" once meant "a woman of strength or spirit, a woman of heroic acts." (definitions taken from Dictionary.com).

The root, or course, is the Latin, "vir", meaning "man".