Wednesday, February 28, 2007

new blog started

okay, i probably have a problem. i realize that (and why oh why does blogger think "okay" is misspelled? the spelling is the latest convention in the ap style guide).

Finding the Words. the blog is dedicated to writing, both the craft and art of it (as in how to) and my personal experiences and frustrations. topics include style issues, "how to", over coming writer's block, and hopefully, the publishing market.

it's a bit geeky, i admit, but i wanted a venue where i could post these things undiluted with other thoughts. the rest of the stuff (though increasingly i'm wondering what else is there) will be posted here.

Monday, February 26, 2007

serenity and goodbye lenin!

serenity: disappointing (the movie, that is).

i think my expectations were too high. i'm a huge buffy and firefly fan, but the movie fell lackluster and tired. it had been long enough since i saw the series that i was really looking forward to joining up with the crew again, but most of the characters fell flat. wash, jayne, kaylee, inara, even zoe, really, get very little face time, though they were such an integral part of the series. mal, as a character, and the mystery of river and simon was not enough to command my sympathies for the most part and elicited only a marginal amount of interest. the plot was largely predictable.

i am reminded he wrote alien ressurection, possibly the worst movie in the series (yes, i actually liked the third one, so there).

goodbye, lenin! i was all set not to like this movie. in fact, i even had my laptop open while ryan watched it. but i was surprised - the mix of humor, desperation, and sadness really work, at least, on this viewer.

Friday, February 23, 2007

stephen king: drawing of the three

what happens when you mix a fist full of dollars with... okay, i don't know. ursula le guin, maybe. well, you get stephen king's dark tower series.

just finished king's the drawing of the three, the second of 7(?). the first is the gunslinger. and damn, i have to hand him my hat: king knows how to tell a story. he makes it a page turner with just enough suspense, but not too much that it feels contrived (like dan brown's da vinci code and george r.r. martin's song of fire and ice series can).

that this is king's first, and perhaps dearest story is obvious: the story is lovingly rendered. i'm not a fan of his horror (i read "it" a while ago; the book did nothing for my innate distrust of clowns) but had read another of his fantasy novels, the eyes of the dragon, many many years ago. few have ever heard of it, but it certainly captured my imagination, enough to want to read the dark tower series.

king moves fluidly between his characters' point of views, never once leaving the reader with vertigo, proving (and giving me hope) that the damn "rules" that almost every book on writing warn you against breaking should, in fact, be broken.

the other thing i've noticed about the first two dark tower series and eyes of the dragon, is how everything falls into place with a near audible click. he's sown his seeds early in the book and by the end of it, he's cashing it all in, leaving just enough to keep the reader going. there's a feeling of completeness that satisfies, especially when we must contend with a world that seems to throw stuff at us with no meaning and no warning. it's nice to believe that things happen for a reason, that there is "ka" (gunslinger-speech for something like destiny). in other words, he wields not only the power of a good story teller, but also the power of a good story. hard to do both, i'm rapidly realizing.

all in all, very cool. i'm a bit nervous about the other 5 books. three books is about all i can take in a series. but for now, this reader is sold, lock, stock, and smoking barrel.

small victories

after all my efforts, i got on the scale and weighed myself. and lost a grand total of (drumroll please!)....
1 pound.

1 pound? is that all? *tap*tap* is this thing broken? i must have sweated at least 1 lb. i could cut off my hair and probably lose a pound. i know, i know, these things happen over time, i've probably gained muscle which is heavier than fat, etc, etc. still, one secretly hopes. just as one writes because one "loves writing and would do it anyway, and being published doesn't matter" but really it does matter, and one always, always hopes.

speaking of writing (and i so often do) i've been working hard to do as countless writing books and seasoned (and non) writers have advised: finish that first draft! the problem is, i feel so intent on finish it that the writing and characters so often feel flat. and as i'm writing a scene i'll know it's not quite right. and sure, i can and will fix it later, but so often, once a chapter is written, i have a hard time reworking it. not because i'm so in love with it i can't bear to cut a word (i've learned to murder my babies) but because it becomes difficult for me to see what's wrong. i have an instinct to let things stay the way they are, rather than changing them for the better. this is true elsewhere in my life as well. so i wonder, is the first draft really so valuable? yes, it's necessary to write it to see where it goes, especially for a chaotic non-outliner like me, but i wonder how much potential is lost in the process?

the alternative is to write as donna tartt wrote the secret history (incidentally one of my all-time favorite books), as reported in poets & writers magazine, to lay one word at a time and not move on until each sentence is perfect. and it shows - the work flows nearly flawlessly. but i think if i did that, it would drive me mad. or i would not finish. it did, after all, take her nearly 10 years to write her first book.

a happy medium? i'm sure one exists. i'm struggling because i'm at the steep part of the learning curve ("oh crap, i probably should have kept notes of all the minor characters i've introduced - now i have to go back and find them all'), but it's time that's precious - it takes so bloody long to figure out how to do things. and i want to finish this book this year, dammit.

why am i so verbose today? dorothea brande has a rememdy for writer's block in her precious book on becoming a writer - you deny yourself any interaction with words, whether in speaking, writing, or reading. by the end of it you will be dying to write. i just came back from the gym, time spent away from the keyboard and the world of my characters. though i read, i feel the words wanting to spill out of me.

perhaps i should pump some of this energy into my book now.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

i am tired, and a little looney.

inside and out. i've been going to the gym regularly for the last two weeks, every day for the last three weeks. it's a difficult habit to get into; you kind of just have to bite the bullet every day and go. but yesterday i had to take a break - i was just too tired. and today, i forced myself to go, but again, very tired. i always feel good afterwards, and then about an hour later i realize crap. i don't want to get up.

i've also been a bit tired on the writing front. i've been writing about 1000 words every day now for... well, i've lost track of how long. pretty much since january, officially anyway, though i started long before that. last fall, maybe. now, whatever muscles/ neurons i use to write are tired, too.

in a way it's a good feeling. only by working until we are tired can we build up our stamina. at least, that's my theory, and i'm sticking to it, dammit. but i think over all, it's a good tired. of course, i caught myself singing at the grocery store today, which in itself wouldn't have been so bad. i sing to myself all the time. but on this particular ocassion i was singing the theme to the old Tiny Toon Adventures cartoon:

we're tiny, we're toony, we're all a little looney...

um, yeah. i got a lot of stares on that one before i clued in.

to live like a cat

having spent many hours now at home with my cats, this is my analysis of how they spend their day:

70% sleeping
10% grooming themselves
15% staring at eachother or out the window, or just out into space (fellow cat owners will recognized that blank, unfocused look)
2% using the litter box or eating
1% frisking about
2% wanting to go in or out the door.

over all, not such a bad life style.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

not so innocuous

is any one else disturbed by the fact that the obnoxiously cute happy feet penguins have been appropriated by roche, a pharmaceuticals company? right now, the penguins are primarily used to advertise for roche's web site, flufacts.com. but i'm worried about the precedent it's setting. junk food and cigarettes are all heavily marketed towards kids. are we going to market pharmaceuticals to them, too?

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

office despot indeed

i went to the local office depot store to buy packing tape. they had just one kind on the shelf suitable for my purposes: a roll of "clear duct tape" selling for over $7. you've got to be kidding me. it wasn't even one of those ginormo-rolls. it was a regular sized, 800 inch roll or some such.

so i went to walgreens, where they had more kinds of packing tape than I cared to count. Suffice it to say, it was more than two. The cheapest: $2.99. approved by the usps for mailing. sounds perfect for me.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

too many

the worst part about being so tied up in writing this durn book for so long is that i've been dying to explore some of the other story ideas popping around in my head. i knew this would happen - i have a short attention span for reading books, so it's only natural that i'd have short attention span for writing them, too. but i must stay focused! at least finish the first draft, or i'll never be done with it.

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Renault's The King Must Die

Just finished Mary Renault's historical fantasy The King Must Die. I say historical fantasy because it is rooted in history, and in fact Renault did a hefty amount of research of Ancient Greece for this novel (according to Amazon and Wikipedia) but it's a retelling of the myth of Theseus, hence the fantasy.

But what a retelling it is. I will say the best parts of the book are the very first chapter and the very last. She starts off describing the sacrifice of a great white stallion, told though the eyes of a four-year-old Theseus. "It was a good clean killing..." she writes. "...Yet, even now, I still remember. How he reared up like a tower, feeling his death, dragging the men like children; the scarlet cleft in the white throat, the rank hot smell; the ruin of beauty, the fall of strength, the ebb of valor; and the grief, the burning pity as he sank upon his knees and laid his brighthead in the dust. That blood seemed to tear the soul out of mybreast, as if my own heart had shed it."

By the end of it I was trembling.

Renault's Theseus is at once an asshole, a cocky youth, and a man striving to be a just and honorable leader. But above all else, he is believable. And I don't know how she does it, but her prose so vividly conveys the sense of the time that you are certain this is indeed how people must have thought and spoken in those days. Most notably I was impressed by how fluidly and naturally she weaves in humanities ties with the gods. I am inspired, and deepy awed, by her writing.

So, too, am I struck by her imaginative power in creating a world of which only fragments remain. Included in those relicts are the ruins of Knossos and the ancient Labyrinth of Messara, which she mentions in her author's notes. For those who know and love the myth, there's a certain thrill in experiencing her rendition of myth into a believable reality.

At times, though, she's a bit too subtle for me. Especially when it comes to the subject of sex she writes with an exceptionally light touch and I'm left wondering, did they, or didn't they? There were several passages where I was sure something profound had passed but it went clear over my head.

At any rate, her book as a power that lingers on the mind. I'll be reading this one's sequel, The Bull from the Sea, next.

This book also made me rethink writing in the first person, which I had previously dismissed. Too often the "I" in books feel too weakly characterized - I felt this most recently in Kostova's The Historian. The third person allows for a more robust protagonist. Not so with The King Must Die. Reading this was almost like being possessed by another person, so strong were his thoughts and emotions.

A fact I did not know about Mary Renault, who was born in England in 1905 and died in 1983: She and her life-long partner Jullie Mullard went to live in South Africa, a place more tolerant to gays. South Africa? Really? Apparently she participated in anti-apartheid demonstrations.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

the twilight princess

"i think it's the best game ever," jane said, her voice hushed.

i rolled my eyes. "oh come on. better than ocarina of time?"

she nodded.

after spending the last two days playing legends of zelda: the twilight princess, i have to agree. it really is the best game. ever. period. the opening music chokes me up. but it also makes me worried - this game has the feel of the game to end all games. after this, what can follow?

the genius of this game falls on two things; the story line and the visual effects. it is breathtakingly beautiful, and the story heartwrenching. admittedly it pushes all the right buttons for me: the battle to save the world against all odds, sacrifice, a hero and heroine who are tragically cursed, and of course, horses, swords, and elves. nitendo has got everything right on this game, combining all the best elements from the previous games. some moments are even lord of the rings inspired - there's a scene taken almost directly from the two towers (when the wargs come over the hill to attack theoden's men on the way to helm's deep) and saruman's smithy - you get to fly through it - it's pretty damn cool. some of the ruins and buildings are similarly lord of the rings inspired. fans of ico will recognize some elements as well (the twilight shadows). and there's a somberness to the story and gameplay that gives each exhilirating victory an element of melancholy. you are forever reminded this is a world in trouble, where you remain only one step ahead of the evil forces at work. you are but link, an elf with a valiant heart caught up in the struggle.

and the game is long... i've been playing just about 50 hours now and still not done. maybe 3/4 of the way though. and there is still so much to do and explore. the puzzles are baffling, the bosses not too difficult, but they require strategy. as each level passes, i think, okay, that's it, it's winding down from here. but no, it just keeps getting better and better. so far i've flown, canoed, smote my enemy from horseback, walked upside down with magnetic boots, and ran around as a wolf in a world trapped in twilight.

the process reminds me that truely, the journey is what matters. the story is simple: save zelda. but along the way, your heart will be captured by link and the inhabitants of the enchanted land, hyrule. the game pulls on powerful mythology that runs deep in the veins.

as i approach the end, though, i get increasingly teary eyed. there's an epic feeling to this game - nintendo held nothing back. so it makes me worry... is this the end?