to sleep, perchance to dream

i am a cursedly light sleeper. the slightest noise, the slightest movement will wake me up. this is bad news for someone who has to share a double bed with three cats and a fidgety boyfriend in a transitional neighborhood. sometimes it's the neighbors down the street shouting at each other. sometimes it's just someone walking down the street talking too loudly on a cell phone. or the cats scratching at the door to be let out, or in, or just getting up to clean themselves. or the boyfriend flipping about. or the light from the neighbor's bathroom shining into our bedroom window through a crack in the curtains. i've tried eye masks and ear plugs--unfortunately, the sensation of them is enough to keep me awake, though i suppose if i kept it up long enough i'd get used to them.

i remember an old cartoon- can't remember if it was porky the pig or daffy duck, but anyway, he can't get any sleep because there's all sorts of disturbances, and gradually his eyes get more and more bloodshot and he becomes more and more insane. this is how i feel, insane with out sleep, disproportionately angry for it. the need to sleep reaches an almost painful desperation. i fantasize about a sound-proofed, completely dark with a comfortable bed where i can just sleep sleep sleep. it seems like forever since i've last slept well enough to wake up refreshed.