a week or so ago ryan and i made a big batch of oxtail soup. at the time, it was in the 80s, and we sat there sweating as we ate it wondering why the heck we had made so hearty a meal. well, now i know. i'm reheating it now, and it's going to be damn good as i sit here shivering in the freakin' 50 degree, fog enveloped weather.

no wonder the durn tomatoes never grow in my yard. no wonder my poor gardenia never flowers.

okay, clearly this is one of those posts i post to post just cause i don't know what to post and i haven't posted in a while. life has been suspended in a bit of a limbo right now. ryan and i are counting down to the big day. most of the stuff is in place. a few key features aren't, but stressing about them isn't going to do much good. i'm sort of looking for a job but not really, only if something sort of hits me upside the head. but the timing will be all off, since i'll have to arrange time off for the wedding and then time off again for the honeymoon. my writing has come to something a lull too, getting up the momentum to start revising and rewriting, toying with a few new projects, but with no clear direction.

in other words, i feel something like the fog must; suspended, hovering, waiting.