while coming home on the bart train the other night ryan leaned in close and whispered in my ear, "you keep staring at people."
i averted my gaze, realizing i had been, in fact, rather intently focused on a woman with a tattoo of a witch on her neck. a moment later i realized that i had looked away from her only to study the slack-faced, sleeping teen-aged boy a few seats down.
i've always been a people watcher, and now that i don't get out of the house much these days i guess my watching has intensified. i love trying to figure people out from what they look like, as if their life histories, not just their emotions, are evident in the protrusion of their lips or the dip of their brows. what was that woman thinking that morning when she paired her somber black dress with a pair of bright red shoes? why did that man choose to gel his hair straight up like that, and what might it say about his attitude toward life?
the more i think about writing, too, the more i like to see what people are reading. i find myself craning my neck to catch a glimpse of their page, to see what the title is. it gladdens me to see people reading on the train, anything from michael crichton to malcom gladwell's blink. what sorts of people read these books, i wonder, and what sorts, someday, might read mine?
4 comments:
In fairness, it's hard to avoid staring at people on the BART. I caught myself doing it later that same trip, someone who was sitting on the floor of the train..
How funny -- one of my sisters also has a habit of staring at people (quite conspicuously, I might add) and you guys share the same birthday! Hmmmm...
yes. i also looooove! staring at people!! dang! I feel very much...normal and unpeculiar now lol..all thanks to you :]. yay. I do the exact same thing you described, I stare at them, not really wishing to talk to them but only and exactly like i'd look at houses and wonder what the story behind them is! [I got excited cuz that's a perfect example! lol] The problem is, sometimes i feel really weird about it, tho, because i'll totaly feel like a stalker. I think i am stalking after a little while..when i become self-conscious, you know...I mean i am sort of looking at every movement they make and whatnot. But let me tell you one thing though, i find it attractive when other people act like themselves regardless of [what they think will be..and what actually happen to be] any repercussions from their environment. I've seen people who have looked at me, and the fact that they don't avert their eyes when i look at them is something i find very attractive....when somebody looks at me, and i look at them and they look away, i don't find that very attractive at all. I may think it's polite..but not attractive..i'd have preferred they'd not looked away, because well..you were looking at me..and i noticed and now you're trying to hide it, to make me seem like the crazy person??lol. LOL. Even if i happen to make a face at them..i still think it's attractive when they don't regret what they were doing..when they still show comofrt in what they were doing, know wadda mena? I think it's attractive when anyone is themself...whithout shame..or worry or w/e lol :)...:] that sentence makes me smile..cool, because it shows confidence and being okay with the way one is. It's cool. :] if other people ain't cool with it,whent hey see u doing it, it's cuz they'd just find it weird to do that themselves...but i still feel like a stalker sometimes lol. But the person who cares that you're "glancing at them" [I mean, you can't call ti staring because it's not like i'm staring at them with eyes wide open in a really creepy VERY stalker-ish wayyyy..] is being too self-conscious anyway..cuz it's not like i'm taking notes on them or anything. lol. Or actively trying to figure out their life trying to figure out their life history..no I'm looking at everyone and they're not that special. And it's also not like i'm doing what i'm doing all the while trying to hide something from them..like a stalker might be. [being dishonest..inotherwords] Anyway, cheers :). And i'm really happy i found someone who was just likeme too! i saw that other people didn't really care much to notice the people around them too much...and most of this past week I've been retributing that thought with a "Well, they're there, aren't they??..and they move, plus they wear colorful clothing which contrasts with the background..lol and have expressions on their faces..so I have to look at them." Get it? lol. I don't really understand why actually more people don't "stare" at others. It's something i really want to know more about...maybe they just don't consider other people very important, only caring about their little world, and too focused on their problems and stuff to be worried about everybody else. Anyway, just some thoughts. :) it'd be cool if you could get back at me... WELL Aight SOnn PZ!. stay safe.LATERrrZzz !
Yes. second comment. Lol. Just wished to add...in astrology there is a rule where if most of the planets in your chart are placed above the top-half of the chart (what is that line called, anyway? anybody?) hmm.. Then you are "extroverted" and viceversa for Introverted. Extroverted in strict psychological terms actually means being interested in the external world..eXTRO-verted. get it? And soo.o.o. I have that in my chart..and so I'm just hypothesizing now that people who are so intesrted in tohers lives and mentalities probably have an "extroverted" chart like i do..and maybe ;] wink..we do.. I dunno. Oh and also, lots of signs in water most likely adds to that too b/c we need a lot of support and understanding fromt eh extrenal world..so we don't feel so strange and "unbelonging" ourselves. Water signs need to feel understood..esp the sign cancer, because after a while they strat to feel a little alien because they feel misunderstood, since they doubt themselves too much. I'm like that, I doubt a lot that my behaviour is "normal".. do you? lol. I think a lot of people do..b/c we don't trust oursleves enough to trust that we are normal lol. Alright, coolzness. his is definitely my last comment..I'll have you know. :] Thankshhh :]
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